Will I ever make it home....
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Happy New Year's
Well, I know I have totally put off writing on this thing and have even debated whether to just delete this since, I really have felt no need to write on here. But I suppose I will continue on here, since it is sort of like a diary and I have always loved the whole nostalgic feeling I get when I look back on all my writing and my stories and on how much life has changed in the past year. It is amazing how simple choices can affect all aspects on your life and how they can literally make you change who you are. So, I figured I would repost my list from last year to have some retrospect on how much more different this year was than the one before.

From 2004-2005
Last year I...(2004)

Was living "alone" for the first time ever....
Was separated from my "husband"......
Was legally cheating on my "husband".....
Was working on New Years Day.....
Had a great view on how life was going to be without "husband".........
Had an almost 2 year old who adored me.....
Was in Texas, and thought I would be there till I died.....
Thought the guy I was with, was a good person.....(boy! was I wrong on that one!)
Had several mental breakdowns.....
Was being sued by the state of Texas and the Attorney General....(thanks, MOM!!)

This year I....(2005)

Am living alone with Gabe....for real.....
Am divorced from "husband"......
Am in a serious relationship with Randy.....
Worked on New Years Day.....
Have a shitty view of life.....in general....
Have an almost 3 year old who treats me like shit......
Currently live in the DC area....will be here till 2008.....
Think the guy I am with is awesome.....(hopefully my judgement is better!)
Haven't broken down....but I did almost cry this morning.....
Am still being sued by the state of Texas, blah blah blah.....

Okay things have changed quite a bit. So, I will make a list of how things have changed since 2005.

This Year I...(2006)

Am living with Randy and Gabe....
Am still divorced (yay, me)....
Am still in a relationship with Randy....(what is it, like 14 months now?)
Will have New Year's off this year...
Have an okay and realistic view of life....
Have an almost 4 year old, who is too smart for his own good....
Still live in the DC area, but I get to leave in August 2007....
Still think the my sweetums is awesome....
Have had a few moments when I just had to escape things....
And have no clue if I am still being sued by Texas....(and I don't care at this point!)

Some new things this year...

Got Homer and Marge, they are bearded dragons...
And got Bonn, the beautiful belgian shepherd who is totally awesome!...
Live in a nice townhouse...
And we are planning on buying a house in Texas together....

So, that is the basic synopsis of my year. It's been a good....well, actually a great year. And I just hope that 2007 is as good, or better than this year. I will be fulfilling my last 8 months in the Army and I will once again be a civilian. I have no clue what I am going to do, but I am so excited to be able to do what I want with my hair and to have piercings if I so desire.

Well, thank you for being a good year 2006, and I will definitely miss you. I will cherish our great moments together. And I will always remember this year. May everyone have a safe and Happy New Year's. I'm out.
posted by The Devil @ 8:03 AM   0 comments
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
All I really want
Do I stress you out
My sweater is on backwards and inside out
And you say how appropriate
I don't want to dissect everything today
I don't mean to pick you apart you see
But I can't help it

There I go jumping before the gunshot has gone off
Slap me with a splintered ruler
And it would knock me to the floor if I wasn't there already
If only I could hunt the hunter

And all I really want is some patience
A way to calm the angry voice
And all I really want is deliverance

Do I wear you out
You must wonder why I'm relentless and all strung out
I'm consumed by the chill of solitary

I'm like Estella
I like to reel it in and then spit it out
I'm frustrated by your apathy

And I am frightened by the corrupted ways of this land
If only I could meet the Maker
And I am fascinated by the spiritual man
I am humbled by his humble nature

What I wouldn't give to find a soul mate
Someone else to catch this drift
And what I wouldn't give to meet a kindred

Enough about me, let's talk about you for a minute
Enough about you, let's talk about life for a while
The conflicts, the craziness and the sound of pretenses
Falling all around...all around

Why are you so petrified of silence?
Here can you handle this?
Did you think about your bills, you ex, your deadlines
Or when you think you're gonna die
Or did you long for the next distraction

And all I need now is intellectual intercourse
A soul to dig the hole much deeper
And I have no concept of time other than it is flying
If only I could kill the killer

All I really want is some peace man
A place to find a common ground
And all I really want is a wavelength
All I really want is some comfort
A way to get my hands untied
And all I really want is some justice...
posted by The Devil @ 7:40 AM   1 comments
About Me

Name: The Devil
Home: Somewhere in, Texas, United States
About Me: I'm a young mom, who stresses out far too much.
See my complete profile
Dear Diary
Past Indiscretions

"Before you do anything, think. If you do something to try and impress someone, to be loved, accepted or even to get someone's attention, stop and think. So many people are busy trying to create an image, they die in the process."-Salma Hayek

The Ones I Adore
Powered by

Free Blogger Templates