Will I ever make it home....: Well, well, well....

Will I ever make it home....

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Well, well, well....

Things have come a loooong way for me since I haven't really done much with my site, but I am starting to figure out all this stuff out. I changed the look to usher in a new year. I mean, I loved my old layout, but I really wanted something a little flashier, and more...unique. So, I took this and tweaked it to my liking. I hope ya'll like it. I am still undecided on the background, even though it is better than a mismatched gray. I think it adds an earthiness to the page, which I really dig. As soon as I remember my Haloscan password, I'll have that hooked up on here once again. So yeah. I had debated on deleting this thing altogether, but now that it looks almost as pretty as I wanted it, I think I shall at least keep it. Maybe I can write some more about what has been going on. I mean this is going to be a big year for me. I am moving back to steamy Texas. I will be (hopefully) buying my first home. And I will be out of the Army. In just 218 days I think, I will have freedom once more. I am so excited about being able to have color in my hair. And I mean, COLOR. I am sure it will take Randy some time to get used to me being all "crazy" as my family puts it, but that is something that I have always loved. And us hispanic women love us some COLOR. Ha ha ha.

Hmm...what else? I still haven't gotten the pictures of my new baby Bonn on my computer, but hopefully I'll have some time either tonight or tomorrow to get them on there and show him off. He has been pretty good, but had a hard time this morning. He made a potty in the house, and that just doesn't fly with me. I can handle the slobbering all over the floor, but potty....Uhm, not so much. gabe has been doing so much better. I mean he is still aggravating at times, but he has been better towards me. He isn't giving me as much attitude in the mornings. I just wish I was a million times more patient with him. I tend to lose my temper very quickly. And that is a big issue with me since I tend to blow up fast and I happen to just stay angry and then I start to feel guilt. Complete and utter guilt and stupidity over the fact that I am raising a child and acting like one.

I have been just thinking about everything. Everything. My financial situation has been kind of shitty, since I am paying so much for daycare, and it seems like the daycare on base is just stringing me along lying to me each month about how they have no spots for him. It would save me over $700 a month. But I know they don't get it. They don't care. And that is upseting. I already dislike them, and this is definitely not helping. I can't seem to get a handle on the whole job search. I am trying to focus on one thing at a time. But I feel so scatter brained at the moment, and it doesn't seem like I will get it together in the next few months. I had planned a trip almost 2 years ago with my best friend and we were supposed to meet up in Texas and hang out, since she has lived in Alaska all this time. But seeing as to how I had to spend my little bit of savings, I can't go. I mean I could, but I would be broke while I was there. Which is no way to go home! I would be dissapointed if I don't get to go over something stupid like money, and my heart keeps telling me that I NEED to go, but my checkbook says otherwise. It is really sad. I don't want to think about it.

RC is getting out of the Navy finally. He only has a couple more days and he'll be done. I am sure he is preoccupied with finding a job in San Antonio, too. But I am sure he'll get an easy enough job and be fine. If it all gets down to the nitty-gritty we'll have to have pt jobs to make it. But we will. I know we will.

So, that's what has been going on I suppose. I think I am in dire need of a vacation. I am sooo burned out.

posted by The Devil @ 1:45 PM

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